Saint Thomas Isle

GORMLEY 001 oil

There’s this river more or less in the heart of Embra that is

well worth a visit. The easiest approach is via the Gallery of

Modern Art (itself well worth a visit); a pleasant path leads you

down through the trees and  on a sudden, lo! the level waters

of Leith. If you walk a hundred yards downstream you come

to Saint Thomas Isle and it is here, any day in June, if you

suffer from any skin disease, acne, rashes, eczema, psoriasis,

impetigo, you must stand in the water, naked, stock-still, eyes

closed, until you have counted up to five hundred (using the

standard  ‘ 1 elephant…2 elephants….3 elephants’  method of


 When you open your eyes, you will be amazed to see that St

Thomas has indeed lived up to his  famous words of hope for

humanity: “All ye who suffer, come to me, and without

making any rash promises,  I will do my best to help.”

It is best to come early.

a G


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